Saturday, October 22, 2016

So, why do you wanna be a writer?

Furrowed eyebrows. The look of confusion. Lips gently parted. A writer? "What do you mean you want to be a writer?"

I was probably fifteen at that time, answering the bothersome question that every adult thrives in asking confused teenagers: what do you want to be when you grow up?

Simple. I wanted to be a writer. Oh you mean like a journalist or those weather people on TV? No, I casually explained. I want to write articles, organize photo shoots, network with everyone-worth-knowing at galas and premieres and interview famous people. Oh, that. Hmm… but it doesn’t pay the bills (like I was supposed to know that at fifteen). Why don’t you be an accountant instead? Before I could wriggle my way out of the awkward, one-way conversation, I was posed with the typical and awful why-don’t-you-be-a-doctor question*


Why can I not be a doctor? Let’s see. Point one: I cannot stand the sight of open-faced intestines swimming in blood. I’ll either scream or hang myself with a stethoscope or do both. Point two: I might accidentally drop my watch into that poor human’s body while conducting an open heart surgery (ok, I borrowed this from one of those ‘90s slapstick Indian films) because I can be the clumsiest twit on earth.

*footnotes: Indians have a weird obsession with being doctors, probably because of the money and the glamour behind the act of saving lives, but mostly the money. In my group of friends, seven out of eleven people have graduated as doctors. I still, for the life of me, cannot understand this epidemic.

Some people admired me for my confidence. Some didn’t. I remember that one time when my friend broke down in high school because she scored 85% (to overachieving types, this is not an achievement) on her English test and told me that without having fantastic grades to score that medical scholarship, her life would be over.
Over? Are you sure, I asked. There’s so many opportunities out there, I said. 
And then she said this: "You have your writing and I know that you can fall back on that. What about me? What’s gonna happen to me? I have nothing."
To be honest, I felt bad for her and brushed away those tears because I understood that struggle. At 15, it seemed like writing was all I had. Imagine flunking a great scholarship, my life would be over too, right? Writing was my life just as how getting this scholarship was important to her.

Then there were the smirks and knowing grins. You mean you’re gonna be like that Gossip Girl lady who writes about parties and underage drinking? You mean you’re gonna write for those mindless women's magazines that tell girls to wait three days before texting a guy but also telling them that sex on the first date is OK?

Once again, no one got it. But that's okay.

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Be yourself. Cliché but true.

"So, M. You wanna start vlogging again, right? But how on earth do you compete with all the other vloggers out there? Like for me, I want to write but there so many writers out there who's probably better or more engaging than me. How on earth do I stand out?".

It was 4.10pm. I was tired, frustrated and bored. 
We were chilling in the swing room in the office. M was already dozing off after a bunch of Trump-Clinton videos and I was at wits' end trying to figure out how to reach this eye care brand to people on the Internet. Honestly, the last place I wanted to be was here. 

M looked up, walked to the table, shrugged and said, "I guess you just have to be yourself."
Oh, like I didn't know that already.




Judging by my wry expression, he quickly added, "Well, these smart vloggers have excellent cameras and other great gears. Also, they have a persona. Like, you've heard of PewDiePie, right? That's a persona."

"A persona? What about Maxim Bady?," I started to laugh, remembering that epic 'girl speaks fluent american' video that suffered the wrath of Maxim Bady's garish opinions.

"Do you actually think Maxim Bady even speaks like that?," M shot a knowing look. "At the end of the day, it's about being yourself, your authentic self. And it's also about having great quality and being persistent."

Be yourself. Righttttt...
And then I wondered, what happened to writing for the love of writing?
Why was I so concerned about being outstanding? The writers I currently follow on Twitter have all been verified, even the ones I dislike are making it big in their relevant fields.


And then there's me. The measly social-media-turned-copywriter telling women why they need a RM2000 anti-ageing cream when I bloody well know that these women are gonna age into a wrinkly prune and die anyway.


On top of discovering my old blog from 2008 (honestly, that has been the highlight of my week), I read through my old posts - not the ones from 2009 coz those sucked, by the way - and remembered how it would take heavy medication to get me to stop writing. So, I made a choice.

I'm gonna write the way I want to write. Whether it's depressing, witty, lame or cheery, I don't really give two hoots anymore. Of course, with the exception of abiding to the style guides of the publications I contribute for. As for this blog, nothing will be barred.

So yes, M. I will take your advice and be myself. That's the only persona the world's gonna get. 

Tagging like it's 2008

So back in the day, tagging people on blogs was the "in" thing. You know, before this whole social media fiasco began. No thanks to my sister, I came across my old blog from 2008 and thought to myself, why don't I bring back this little tagging trend?

For those of you who don't remember the process, here's how it goes: I'll answer these questions, and then I'm gonna tag 7 people. So if you're tagged, you'll have to complete these questions, either on your own blog or if you're a vlogger, a vlog or on a web page if you're a web developer *wink*

Here goes!

Tagged by Christen Koh, from 2008. 

A. Attached or single? Blissfully attached. 
B. Best friend? JuYi Wong. 

C. Cake or pie? How dare you make me decide. I love both! 
D. Day of choice? Friday (it's that feeling of anticipation!!)

E. Essential item? My phone. 
F. Favorite color? I don't have one but I seem to gravitate to earthy shades

G. Gummy bears or worms? Definitely, worms! 
H. Hometown? Selayang. 

I. Favorite indulgence? Dark chocolate. Always. 
J. January or July? January...hey, I get to start all over again.

K. Kids? I don't really want kids but... I'd like to have twin boys. 
L. Life isn't complete without? Dessert. 

M. Marriage date? It has to be August. As the year, hahaha...
N. Number of magazine subscriptions? I follow Esquire, ELLE, GQ, Harper's BAZAAR, Cosmopolitan, W and New York Times on Twitter. Do all of those count as subscriptions?

O. Oranges or apples? Apples. 
P. Phobias? LIZARDS!

Q. Quotes? "In order to be successful, you sure have to go through shit one. I don't know why life is like that," as quoted by my crazy boss (verbatim). 
R. Reasons to smile? Dessert.

S. Season of choice? We have summer every year. What's there to choose? Autumn, maybe. 
T. Tag 10 people. 10? I'm skipping this since I have to tag 7 people later.

U. Unknown fact about me? Even I don't know it. You know, since it's unknown. 
V. Vegetable? Err...spinach?

W. Worst habit? Leaving things everywhere. 
X. X-ray or ultrasound? I think I'm due for an X-Ray!
Y. Your favorite foods? Seriously? I'm supposed to pick ONE out of a gazillion favourites?
Z. Zodiac sign? Gemini. I don't care what the new astrology report says but I'm ALWAYS a gemini.

He/she will have to come up with 7 interesting or random facts about themselves 
and then tag 7 other people to do the tag challenge. 

1. I wish I was American. Not white but maybe an Indian-American. 
2. I'm an introvert but I don't think introversion is cool. It's overrated. 
3. I can never have too many Famous Amos cookies. 
4. I sometimes feel like I'm Elle Woods, Blair Waldorf, Carrie Bradshaw, Sylvia Plath and Rachel Green in one person. 
5. I once dreamed of being an audio engineer. 
6. I cannot stand people who yell. 
7. I love cats but dogs have been attracting me lately. 


Tag 7 people: Rachel Tiffany, Stephanie Duke, Alyssa Koh, Charmain Sim, Luveeniya Sai, Juyi Wong, Shahma Ahmed and (I'll break the rule)...Sheu Quen! 


You're it!